The American Supreme Court And Same Sex Marriage, By Femi Fani-Kayode

Femi Fani-Kayode

“It is clear that the world is changing and that America, under Obama, has redefined her moral and religious values dramatically.”

The Supreme Court of the United States of America is poised to rule on the legality of same sex marriages today, the March 26, 2013. President Barack Obama has openly endorsed such marriages just as has the much loved former American Secretary of State, Hilary Clinton. According to a CNN poll, no less than 58 per cent of the American people support same sex marriages as well.

It is clear that the world is changing and that America, under Obama, has redefined her moral and religious values dramatically. I saw this coming and that is precisely why I have never been a great fan of Barack Obama and that, much to the chagrin of my fellow Africans and men and women of colour from all over the world, I openly opposed his re-election last year and wrote a highly celebrated essay titled ”Can Barrak Obama Be Trusted” which created quite a stir and which was published in the newspapers of no less than 6 countries in the world. The truth is that Obama’a latest endorsement of same sex marriage utterly appalls me.

What is the world coming to? How come we suddenly find it so easy to turn our backs on the word of God which specifically defines marriage as a holy union between a man and a woman which was designed primarily for the purpose of procreation? Not only does Obama and 58 per cent of the American people believe in same sex marriage, but they also believe in same sex couples adopting and raising children. Is this not a tragedy of monumental proportions? Has America turned its back on the Living God? There is not one of the three great monotheic faiths on our planet, whether it be Christianity, Islam or Judaism, that supports same sex marriage. As a matter of fact they all specifically forbid it and describe it as an abomination.

I have nothing against gays and I believe that a person’s sexual preferences or sexuality is entirely his/her own business. I also accept the fact that gays should not be in any way discriminated against or subjected to hate speech. Your sexuality is a matter of choice and no-one has the right to deny you the right to make that choice. This much I concede and accept. However I draw the line when it comes to the issue of redefining the traditional definition of marriage and allowing gay couples to enter such a union. This is because the institution and it’s definition was established by Almighty God Himself and it is not for man to alter or amend it. Attempting to do so is tantamount to man trying to play God. It is not right, it is morally indefensible and it is a violent and unprecedented attack on the institution of marriage and our traditional family values.

Yet America is not alone in its madness. Europe has gone crazy too. In France, the U.K, Holland, Sweden, Denmark, Germany and various other European countries, legislation to pave the way for same sex marriage has already been introduced and in some of those countries it is already lawful. The same thing is happening in Argentina, where gays are now allowed to marry, and I gather that Brazil is treading the same path. What is the world coming to? Will we ever see gay marriages in Africa and in Nigeria? I have little doubt that South Africa, the traditional bastion of liberalism in Africa, will be the first to permit it if they haven’t done so already.

Should we allow Nigeria to climb this slippery slope as well? I sincerely hope not. Meanwhile, let us wait to see whether the American Supreme Court will do the right thing and shoot this abominable and morally repugnant concept down or whether they will affirm it. For the sake of God and humanity I sincerely hope that they choose the latter course.

I pray that I have not hurt anyone’s feelings by expressing these views on same sex marriage because the last thing that I would want is for anyone to describe me as a raging and ranting homophobe. I am far from that. As a matter of fact I think that it is a mark of a truly civilised society when people can tolerate and treat with love those that are ”different” from them whether it be as a consequence of their faith, culture, colour or sexuality. The call for the enforcement of the rights of ethnic or sexual minorities, including the rights of homosexuals and lesbians, is an ethos and philosophy that I wholly subscribe to. In any plural, multi-religious and multi-cultural society, it is incumbent upon us all to be as tolerant and accommodating as much as possible about the peculiarities and preferences of one another. I am proud to say that some of my closest friends are gay and as a matter of fact many of the young men that I went to British public school with many years ago openly experimented with gay sex and gay love only for most to later discover that it wasn’t for them. I see or feel no shame in that because for many it was simply a beautiful journey of self-discovery and love. As far as I am concerned it is each to his own but that should not stretch into marriage or the right of same sex couples to adopt and raise children.

Our country Nigeria, as in most of Africa, is a land that is plagued with ignorance and intolerance when it comes to the issue of sexuality and gays. We are wholly intolerant and we are totally insensitive when it comes to the feelings of those in our community that are gay. Gay-hunting, gay-bashing, gay beating, gay-hating and even gay-killing is a favourite past time of ours and as far as I am concerned this is totally unacceptable. For example how can we have laws that send a man or woman to jail or to his or her death simply because he or she has different sexual preferences to the rest of us? As long as the two parties that are involved are consenting adults, what they do in the privacy of their homes or hotel rooms is surely no-one else’s business. We cannot regulate people’s sexual habits or preferences but at the same time we have a duty to protect the institution of marriage as it is described and defined in the Holy Bible, the Holy Koran and the Torah. My position is therefore clear and it is as follows. I say ”yes” to a tolerant and open society that allows individuals to be gay, to explore their sexuality and to indulge in their sexual preferences without any sanction or persecution. At the same time I say ”no” to same sex marriages which I believe are a step too far and a direct attack on the family and God’s purpose for a holy union that is designed and meant to lead to the procreation of children. The line is thin but the difference is clear. May God continue to guide us all in these matters.


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  • Funke Apata

    Coming from a serial adulterer? What Moral standing do you have to lean on regarding certain issues Femi Fani kayode? Hypocrite comes to mind,and you remind me of people who select what suits them in the bible to live by while condemning others who fall short of your delusional holy standards. Does YOUR faith support fornication? Adultery?lying?beating women?maltreating people?arrogance?. Acts that YOU are VERY guilty of? Because nobody sits in some court to pass a law for or against it does not make it acceptable. So my dear sir,face your own personal demons of committing adultery up and down and let the gays and their same sex marriage issues be. Hypocrite!!!!!

    • stephen

      It seems u knw the gentleman personally. Are u one of his mistress?. Not a human on this earth can hit his or her chest that they are perfect. Hence that should not not stop us from speaking against evil. I am no saint,but I sincerely agree with Fani on this one.


      Thumb§ up Sis/bro! Rightly said! 😉

  • ayotola

    I support Fani-kayode hundred percent,although none of us is perfect ,we all have our personal flaws but not the gay marriage thing.sodom and Gomorrah wasn’t this bad.I’m sure God himself will show these countries his indignation soon.Gay marriage is devil’s form of rebellion against God.

  • Ibeneme Emeka

    I don’t agree with the views of Femi Kayode.The reason being that he is contracdicting himself,tell me Н̣̣̣̝̇̇̇ø̲̣̣̥ can one say he supports the idea of one having his/her own sexual preferences but does not support same sex marriage.It is better you support a thing or oppose it that’s all.

    • Red

      Exactly my point too!!! See my comment……

  • “The Supreme Court of the United States of America is poised to rule on the legality of same sex marriages today, the March 26, 2013.”

    The statement above is not true.
    The Supreme Court won’t be ruling on same sex marriages case today. The Justices simply heard oral arguments.

    I wonder why some of our opinion writers sometimes jump the gun to write about issues when they lacked firsthand knowledege & of all the facts. They write & present as otherwise factual.
    All the facts are needed to write an opinion.

  • Red

    Mr. Femi Fani-Kayode flawed his own argument because he based his disagreement of the same sex marriage on religion and religious books; if we are to follow religion then you have to do a way with anything gay completely because any of the 3 religions he used for his analysis does not support or accept being gay and the Holy Bible, Quran or Torah as mentioned all see gay as an abomination. Therefore you can not say ¨ sexuality is a matter of choice and no-one has the right to deny you the right to make that choice¨ yet you are willing to deny them that particular right to make a choice of who to get married to. So my point is if we claim to be liberal and accept the right of gays and lesbians to practice or indulge in their sexual preference then we must be liberal enough to accord them that same right to decide to marry or not, which I guess that is what President Obama is trying to do by consenting to same sex marriage as a man that upholds his ideals, believes and true to his words. And if we want to be religious and pious as most Nigerians claim to be and we want to uphold those religious values we believe in as proponents of our religion then we should condemn gay and lesbianism altogether. So we can not play to the gallery and try to win cheap accolade and relevance by manipulating religious sentiments at will as most Nigerian leaders and elites do.
    So sir, if you are not a homophobe (given your closeness to several gays and possible experimentation and enjoyment with them) and you believe in the fundamental right of choice and freedom, then you must accept everything that comes with the practice of that right. But if you are an ardent believer in religion and you want to uphold the traditional African tradition then you must come out to condemn entirely the practice of gay and lesbianism and even support the Nigerian parliament that is trying to pass a law to make same sex sexual preference illegal, without fear of being labelled a homophobe (with due respect which you might be from close analysis of yourself as a result of your previous experiences). The bible says if you are neither hot nor cold you shall be spitted out….

  • emeka

    The article is passionate but leaves me thoroughly confused. Mr Fani-Kayode in my opinion is no different from the Obama he castigates. The gay/lesbian issue has no middle ground. You are either for it or against it. A traditional marriage is between a MARRIED MAN and HIS WIFE.
    If Mr Kayode is basing his beleifs on religion then his condemnation should extend to all forms of same sex liasons and even cohabitation of all non married heterosexuals.


    It’s only in Nigeria you will see people professing to be religious without living out the life! Issues that are more pressing that’s needs the most urgent attention to be addressed in our so called government houses won’t be addressed…na Gay Marriage issue dem dey busy they clamour for whether to be allowed or not…perhaps most of them in there and even their children are not left out in the picture of gay or same sex relationships!!!

    Nigeria leaders should wake-up and face their tasks at what is most needful to be addressed in our nation now before matters reaches its “Fever Pitch”!