We get a magical and emotional feeling from watching a couple exchange vows and sign a document that validates their induction into the sacred institution called marriage.
However, our magical feeling disappears upon receiving the news that our dream couple is getting divorced.
Compared to several decades ago, the rate at which marriages are getting dissolved in the 21st century is quite alarming.
Nowadays, we see couples getting separated barely six months after their weddings.
So naturally, this raises many concerns in our society, especially among older generations shocked to see the “Till death do us part” promise being easily broken by young couples.
A recent PREMIUM TIMES article inspired us to conduct a public opinion poll on our official Facebook page.
This newspaper created this poll to garner our readers’ views and concerns on the high divorce rate among young couples.
Modern times, new rules
Several Facebook users attributed the increase in divorce rates to the Nigerian traditional value system shift.
The introduction of western culture to Nigeria was accompanied by various ideologies like feminism, which, according to some users, prevents a wife from submitting to her husband.
In addition, it creates room for disrespect, an act some men cannot tolerate.
Young couples who get divorced are accused of living a fake life on social media, trying to impress their followers and friends instead of focusing more on strengthening the bond between them.
In addition, posts on social media project the perfect picture of what a marriage should be, which serves as a wrong foundation for couples to build their relationship.
Need to impress
Impress in this context relates more to both parties in a marriage.
A user points out how, during courtship, a man woos a lady by presenting a perfect version of himself. But once they get married, his behaviour changes to a different one.
The same applies to the behaviour of a lady. So, upon revealing their true identities, they cannot tolerate each other, leading to the dissolution of their marriage.
Rush in, rush out
Lack of proper preparation is another reason listed by the majority of the Nigerians who answered the poll.
Couples fail to take time to study one another and identify potential challenges before jumping into marriage. This lack of patience prevents them from critically assessing their compatibility, affecting the lifespan of their relationship.
Many users claimed that couples who get divorced do not have a fear of God in them and lack proper religious lessons regarding issues like marriage.
For example, a user cites the biblical instruction of submission to husbands disobeyed by women who claim to have equal status to their husbands.
Lack of purpose
Before venturing into marriage, Nigerians state that most couples don’t have a clear purpose in mind. This causes them to use worldly things and physical attractiveness as a yardstick to determine if they are compatible.
Absence of love
A recurring example used to buttress this point was couples who marry each other for financial benefits.
In the absence of love, there is a limit to how long money can hold the pillars of marriage. While money can make a couple happy, sometimes it covers the lies and deception in marriage.
Low level of understanding
Users argue that young couples who get married don’t have a deep understanding of the sacred institution they are committing to. Instead, many see it as an achievement or a prerequisite to determining an individual’s success.
Immaturity also plays a role in the low level of understanding because it limits the experience couples have in the definition of marriage.
Cheating partners is another reason identified by many Nigerians. Before getting married, some couples engage in premarital sex with multiple partners, an act they find difficult to stop. It often leads to extra-marital affairs.
In a situation where their partners become aware of this, it breeds a lack of trust, causing a ripple effect on the marriage.
Focusing more on wedding than marriage
Nigerians advised couples to focus on the aftermath of the wedding rather than the clothes worn at the wedding, the caterer to be hired, or the location of the wedding.
Focusing only on the wedding makes it impossible to predict plans for the real deal, marriage.
This reason appeared throughout the poll. Economic hardship is another causal factor affecting the increase in divorce rates. It is often unpopularly said, “No money, more problems.”
Know any other reasons? Let us know in the comment section below.